DEAR MISS MANNERS: My son is in first grade. We drive him to his school to drop him off and pick him up, which involves parking him and escorting him to and from the building.
These drop-offs and pick-ups usually take around 15 minutes each.
I have gotten into the habit of parking on a residential street that is convenient for getting in and out without having to wait for crossing guards and others.
Lately I’ve noticed the lady outside the house I usually park in front of, giving me sideways glances, and the other day she waved her finger at me from afar like I was a naughty schoolboy.
This residential street is approximately half a block from the school and is a public street with no parking permit required.
The husband and wife in this house are obviously retired and well-off, and they park their car in the garage; I don’t encumber them in any way.
Should I start parking elsewhere? My instinct tells me that I have every right to park there, so why should I make my life harder to accommodate them? They were the ones who bought a house next to a primary school (the school has been there since 1957).
Am I allowed to continue parking there?
GENTLE READER: Yes, but if the dirty looks persist and you feel emboldened, you can reasonably say, “I’m sorry, but parking on this street doesn’t appear to be restricted.” Did I miss something?
Miss Manners simply asks you to prepare yourself for the answer.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: In January, I had the pleasure of attending two end-of-year celebrations. Both events were potlucks, to which I happily contributed dishes.
The hosts provided drinks like water, tea and coffee. The parties were very well attended and everyone seemed to be having fun.
However, a few days after each gathering, I received a message from the hosts. They mentioned how much they had spent on the party and asked the guests for a donation of $10 to $30, providing details of their financial application.
This approach seemed to me to be more of a fundraiser than a social gathering with friends. Is this a common practice in modern times? Is it now standard for hosts to ask for monetary contributions after the event to cover their expenses?
I want to make sure I’m aware of current social etiquette.
GENTLE READER: Aside from the audacity of asking guests to both prepare the party and pay for their drinks, Miss Manners can’t imagine how anyone could even consume $10 worth of water, tea or coffee.
So it would appear that guests also pay rent for use of the venue. This borders on extortion.
There’s nothing wrong with having a planned potluck, but that’s where it ends. Hosting a party has to take some of the responsibility for basic amenities. Even restaurants don’t charge for still water.
Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to his email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
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