Maria Shriver opened up about a parenting tip she learned from her late mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver, and why she thinks it instilled good manners in her children.
Appearing on a recent episode of the TODAY podcast “Making Space with Hoda Kotb,” Shriver, 69, said she taught her children to stand “out of respect” whenever she entered a room — which she says they still do today. .
“I make them stand up,” Shriver said. “I used to make them. Now they stand up.”
Shriver, who is the niece of former President John F. Kennedy, shares daughters Katherine, 35, and Christina, 33, and sons Patrick, 31, and Christopher, 27, with ex-husband Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Shriver said the rule didn’t just apply when she entered a room.
“I wanted my children, when I walked into the room, or their dad walked into the room, or you walked into the room, to stand up out of respect,” she said.
Shriver also encouraged his children’s friends to do the same when they visited them: “When their friends came to their house, I would say, hmm.”
She continued: “I didn’t want to walk into the room and they would be sitting looking at a phone or watching the game. I was like, ‘I’m here. We’re here and here I am.’ .And look me in the eyes, say hello, thank me for coming, write me a thank you note if I take you somewhere.'”
“Even though my kids complained and bitched about it, they now say it was a good thing,” she added.
Shriver said this rule was something her mother — who died in 2009 — also enforced when she was growing up.
She added that her mother and grandmother, Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy, were “very big on good manners.”
Another rule of etiquette she learned from her elders was to bring interesting topics of conversation to the table, she continued.
“When we went to the table, everyone had to have something to bring to talk, to discuss. My mother would say to me: ‘What is your opinion on the Gospel? What is your opinion on what the president said today today?’ ?’” she said.
“You could be 10, 11, 19, 20 years old, but you had to step up.”
Shriver said that at the heart of his parenting style was the idea that his children were “four distinct individuals” who knew they were valued and “a priority in a public family.”
She added that she wanted to “protect their privacy” and “ensure they were not part of political pamphlets” or “used as props.”
Shriver’s approach to parenting and her emphasis on teaching her children manners aligns with the authoritarian parenting style, which is characterized by setting rules and high standards.
As Business Insider previously reported, experts say authoritative parenting can help children develop responsibility and emotional regulation.
“This style encourages children to take responsibility for their own actions and make decisions appropriate for their age and development,” Kalley Hartman, marriage and family therapist and clinical director of Ocean Recovery, told BI in 2023 .
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