TV personality Kelly Osbourne joined actor Dax Shepard on Monday’s episode of her “Armchair Expert” podcast to speak candidly about the challenges she has faced staying sober during the coronavirus pandemic.
The two discussed their substance abuse histories and how they both dealt with recent relapses.
Shepard, who is married to actor Kristen Bell, revealed in September that he relapsed after taking prescription pain relievers after surgery for a motorcycle accident after 16 years of abstinence.
Osbourne said last month she had relapsed from her alcoholism after almost four years of abstinence.
She told Shepard she was following complications with Alcoholics Anonymous during the COVID-19 pandemic.
“When my forties came and the world changed, I started to change too,” she said.
Osbourne explained that she didn’t like attending meetings online. She said the in-person meetings meant “everything to me” and credited them with helping her “find out who I am.”
The “Project Runway Junior” judge said she became “angry and resentful” when she “got nothing” from the Zoom meetings and eventually left the program. The 36-year-old TV personality said she had convinced herself that she was ‘normal’ and was no longer a drug addict.
“Slowly but surely I stopped calling my sponsor,” Osbourne said. “Slowly but surely I stopped connecting with my daughters. Slowly but surely, a girl relapsed. Then another girl relapsed, and then all of my friends relapsed.
And although those she was close to on the program struggled with their sobriety during the pandemic, Osbourne said she was proud of herself for having kept sober “all along like the worst part of the lockdown.”
“I do not know what happened. It all started to get amazing, ”Osbourne said of the time. “I went, ‘Oh, I’m normal now, I’m happy. I don’t need that fucking shit anymore. I went through this whole pandemic with nothing! “
She then explained that giving in to this attitude led to a domino effect that jeopardized her sobriety.
“And then I sat by a pool, all by myself, and I saw this girl having a glass of champagne, and I was like, ‘I’ll have one.’ And I just got one and it was good. And I had a good time, and I didn’t think about it. And then a few weeks went by and I was like, ‘I did it then, I can do it again.’ “
The former “Masked Singer” candidate said the restraint “did not last long”.
“Two weeks later, it’s done…. I did embarrassing shit. Blacked out, ”she said.
“In my mind, I was still in control. It wasn’t until last weekend that I found myself covered in ranch dressing by my friend’s sunburnt pool, looking like a piece of shit, that I was like, ‘Maybe I don’t have that under control. ‘ ”
Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne’s daughter said her new boyfriend, whom she described as “the healthiest relationship I’ve ever known”, has helped her get back on track.
“I’m trying new forms of therapy that I’ve never done before,” she says.
Osbourne’s story seemed to resonate with Shepard, who explained that he was vulnerable to relapses “when things are going right”. “I expect to be miserable,” he told Osbourne. “I expect to be uncomfortable, and there’s a combination of ‘I don’t deserve it’, one, then two, when it’s all right, ‘Now I have to take it to another level.’ ‘
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