Joe Rogan Is Weirder Than JD Vance in Netflix’s Gay Sex-Obsessed Live Special

Joe Rogan makes Austin weird. And not in a good way.

The wildly popular podcaster, who also happens to be a stand-up comedian, moved to Texas during the pandemic, opened his own comedy club in Austin, and filmed his first stand-up special live-streamed worldwide Saturday night for Netflix in San Antonio, where the comedian eulogized his Texan best friends Alex Jones and Elon Musk and threw out a few weird ideas of his own. How weird?

While he touched on a wide range of topics, Rogan focused throughout the hour on men receiving sexual pleasure in ways the comedian felt were unnatural.

Rogan, who joked on stage about the possibility of alien life long before he became the world’s richest and most popular podcaster, returned to the topic once again, saying he’s “so invested” in the existence of aliens that “if they’re not, I’m going to feel really stupid.” But this time, he focused on the propensity of abduction stories to include anal probes, and mused that what these abductees aren’t telling us is how the aliens gave them the best orgasms of their lives.

“I just want to be very clear. I believe in transgender people,” Rogan insisted. “Because I think the world is weird and nature is weird, and nature can do dirty tricks on you and make you think you’re in the wrong body. And I fully support your right as an adult to do whatever you want to do to make yourself happy. I believe in freedom and I believe in love. But I also believe in crazy people.”

Rogan wondered why “suddenly every man in a dress is gorgeous and brave,” and blamed the pop culture of his era for depictions of killers as being crazier when they wore dresses, citing Psycho, ThesilenceofthelambsAnd Little Red Riding Hood“It’s almost as if some evil wizard cast a magic spell on the entire world,” he remarked. “With a wave of a magic wand, you can walk through the women’s locker room with a hard dick, and anyone who complains is a Nazi. Abracadabra! And it worked.”

Like Donald Trump and JD Vance, Rogan needed his viewers to know that he wasn’t “weird,” but that it was the “new reality” that was “weird,” saying, “We can’t just wear lipstick, now we can shit in the women’s restroom.” When his fans cheered, he grabbed a glass of water and laughed, “All of a sudden, it’s a hate rally.”

He then told a story about a “hairy guy in a dress” yelling at a police officer at a reproductive rights rally, and suggested, “First of all, he’s probably not even a real trans person. He’s probably a Republican. He’s probably an agent provocateur sent to discredit your organization with ridiculous behavior. Listen. Alex Jones taught me that 20 years ago.”

“Look, he’s right about a lot of things, but he was wrong about one thing,” indirectly referencing the defamation lawsuit filed by parents of victims of the Sandy Hook mass shooting that nearly bankrupted Jones for suggesting the 2012 massacre never happened.

Troy Conrad/Netflix

Earlier in the hour-long live show, Rogan joked about his own reputation as a prominent conspiracy theorist. “We lost a lot of people to COVID, and most of them are still alive,” he said to cheers and applause. “Yeah. Right? Right! There’s a lot of people I don’t get along with anymore. Before COVID, I would have told you that vaccines were the most important invention in human history. After COVID, I’m like, I don’t think we went to the moon. I think Michelle Obama has a dick. I think Pizzagate is real. I think there are direct energy weapons in Antarctica.”

The audience roared in approval, but Rogan quickly backtracked on the former first lady. “I’m kidding. I don’t think Michelle Obama has a penis. But I believe all this other crap.”

The comedian went further by poking fun at himself, noting that “the funniest way for me to die is if I die of COVID” and responding to Prince Harry’s criticism of his anti-vaccine misinformation. “My first thought was, ‘Fuck. I did it? I might have!’” he said with a smile. “But here’s my take on it, honestly: If you’re getting your vaccine advice from me, is it really my fault?”

“That’s not my job, kids. I’m a professional chatterbox, okay?” he said in his defense. “Some of the things I say make sense. A lot of the things I say don’t. It’s up to you to figure out what’s true. That’s the fun of it.”

Although he complained that his harshest critics took his comments out of context, he also admitted that “if you take me out of context, I’m giving you a lot to work with,” and that when he watched a YouTube compilation of all the times he said the “N” word on his podcast, he thought he might be racist.

And finally, to critics who accuse him of being homophobic, Rogan responded, “I’m not homophobic at all. I’m the complete opposite. I wish I was gay,” thinking that his life would be easier and allow him to once again utter the “F” slur for gay people. “Oh, how I miss it.”

He conceded that homophobia still exists for gay men, but added: “Nobody hates gay women, and that’s why you can say ‘dyke.'” Then he argued for more jokes along those lines: “If you want equal love, you have to make equal jokes, because that’s how you find out if you’re boring.”

He’s not hateful, Rogan insisted, because “I love gay men. But I think of gay men the same way I think of cougars. I’m glad they’re real, but I don’t want to be around them. They’re guys who fuck guys. I don’t like my chances!”

He continued to insult gays and people with developmental disabilities, while defending himself by saying, “I’m more afraid of black people than I am of r—-ds. Duh. Don’t you know how jokes work, f—t? Everything is supposed to be funny. Words are meant to be funny, kids.” His suggestion? “I think we should pay to use the most offensive words and the money would go to cancer research.”

Rogan did not reveal how much of his Netflix salary he plans to donate for all the insults he used during his hour on air.