DEAR ABBY: I’m sad that I didn’t find a lasting husband.
I’m divorced and my past relationships and marriage feel like intentional hits. I’m not sure what caused this.
I’m in my forties and I would still like to have a man in my life. The men I’ve met all seem to enjoy having their house to themselves. It’s pretty scary.
Some friends told me that the maids were already taken, so I’m waiting for the divorce.
Should I try online dating? Do you think I should contact another state for someone?
— IMPATIENT IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR IMPATIENT: Stop waiting for a divorce to “happen”: These men have been burned and are unlikely to be candidates for marriage in the near future.
Since an increasing number of encounters are conducted through online dating sites, write a profile and post it about a couple that is aimed at mature adults, preferably who live relatively nearby. If you meet someone, take it slowly and you might have better luck.
DEAR ABBY: A few years ago, my parents offered me a beautiful property and the opportunity to build a small house, without a mortgage.
The problem is that during those few years I got married and started a family. We have now outgrown the house and are in desperate need of a renovation.
We would like to sell the house and use the funds to purchase something more homey. Adding is not an option because our funds are limited and we could use the proceeds to purchase something we won’t have to repair.
I don’t know how to tell my parents that we want to sell. My father worked hard to give me this opportunity, and I don’t know how to say it. No advice?
— IN A DILEMMA IN MICHIGAN
DEAR DILEMMA: Tell your father that you are grateful for the effort it took him to give you the chance to own your own home.
So bite the bullet and point out that since the house was built, your family has grown to the point that it’s no longer practical, so you’d like to sell it and use the money to move to a bigger place that can accommodate more comfortably. your needs.
Doing this is neither unreasonable nor thankless.
DEAR ABBY: Is it possible to lose your sense of humor due to a stroke?
Before this happened, my dear sister was witty, fun-loving, and a party-goer. She has recovered physically, but she no longer has a sense of humor. Everything is very serious for her now and she doesn’t understand when someone makes a joke.
I want her to “chill out,” but I’m afraid it’s a result of her brain injury.
An overview ?
— LAUGH BY MYSELF
DEAR LAUGH: What you are describing could very well be related to your sister’s stroke.
When this happened, certain areas of his brain were “disconnected.” It’s not his fault, and telling him to “relax” won’t make the situation better.
Thank your higher power that she has recovered physically, keep your comments direct and literal, limit the jokes and you will both be more at ease.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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