I was worried about the age gap between my children. I didn’t need to be.

• My first two children have a two -year age gap, which seemed right to me.
• Six years later, I was again pregnant and I worried about the age gap between my children.
• However, their dynamic of brothers and sisters is great and they are incredibly close.

When my first two children were born, the two years old Age gap between them I felt good – close enough to be playmates, but far enough to keep things (mainly) manageable, although occupied and chaotic.

The first days were a blurring of white nights, toddle crises of toddlers and whirlwind of raising it two babies at the same time. But I threw myself with all my heart. Endless craftsmanship, library visits, exploration of nature, playing track and Fort creations in imaginary worlds have filled our days.

I gathered with the waste and the joy that prospered in these exhausting first years. However, I also waited for the day I could leave diapers, sleep struggles and Little pot drive – All in one fell.

Milestone after the milestone came and came: first steps, first words, first days of school. Finally, I found myself giving the double stroller, the toys, the milk, the leftover shooting and the cradle. All the baby equipment that was once essential was now like relics of a phase that I thought I was behind me.

Then came the surprise: a third child, six years after my youngest. Suddenly, I had to start again.

I was wondering what another child would mean for the link between my two older

I sent a timid sms to a friend, asking me if his child had finished with the stroller I had transmitted. Can I see it again? I sent frantic messages to other people with whom we had spent clothes, asking me if they still had them to come back now that their own had exceeded. I traveled the Local community groupsHoping to find all the items of baby that I had sold or given impatiently, assuming that my family was over.

But above all, I was worried.

My two older ones were finally at an age when sleep was not a constant stressor. I had rediscovered my hobbies, climbed into the swing of my fitness routine and started to write. I reconnected myself when they won more independence.

The logistics of our life had become simpler. I could plan trips without concern for accidents if we do not stop in enough public toilets, or unexpected naps that would ruin bed later. And now I was here back at first. Then, greater concern takes place: what would this new brother mean for my older children?

Their link was close: sometimes beautiful, sometimes complicated, as much rivalry as love. I was wondering how a A younger brother would change this dynamic And how I would widen my attention between a newborn baby and two increasingly independent elementary children.

Having a newborn was sometimes difficult again

The first months were a vagueness. I forgot how demanding newborns could be. I felt like I had to relearn how to take care of a baby. After all, I hadn’t held a newborn since my child was one. And I did not know if I would remember how to do everything, and even less juggling while being the mother I wanted to be in a 6 and 8 year old child.

These first days were heavy. It was summer, and I dreamed of taking them to the lake, to the water park, to do all the funny summer things that we had always appreciated. Instead, I was stuck in my bed, breastfeeding on demand, mourning in front of the moment I was missing with them. There were tears – many of them – all of us, because we have adapted to the new rhythm of our family. They were old enough to understand why the new baby needed so much time and my attention, but jealousy and sadness have always slipped.

Over time, I realized that I had nothing to fear

Little by little, however, because my youngest has reached new steps, it has become easier. The first day Back to school This fall, my two elders argued to find out who could push the stroller during the walk. What I had feared would be the resentment transformed into affection, pride and sense of responsibility. The joy of watching her age enough to get involved with them was immeasurable. This first laugh of the belly – led by one of their silly faces – has become one of my most expensive memories. At that moment, I knew everything would be fine.

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Over time, something surprising has started to happen. My older children have adapted to their new roles with incredible ease. The biggest stage came when they started teaching things to him. It started little – my daughter teaching him to stack blocks, my son helping her learn new words – but I could see the magic occur. Often, I would find all three hugs on the sofa, the two oldest explaining the best parts of a beloved television program and explaining the characters.

The link between them deepened as my youngest began to interact more with his brothers and sisters. She learned to walk and followed them everywhere. Now when she is upset, she sometimes runs towards one of them instead of me. Of course, I be careful not to let them do too much. I balance their desire to help and supervise by ensuring that they do not do it feel like. I also pay for babysitting tasks when they help and make sure not to overload them with responsibilities.

With hindsight, I see how my concerns about the age gap were unfounded. My youngest has formed a unique link with his brothers and sisters, a shaped by their age difference In a way that I had not planned. Although different from the link that my two elders share, it’s just as beautiful. I hope that, as adults, they include this link with them, it doesn’t matter where life takes them.