DEAR ABBY: I am a professional, educated adult who returned home due to concerns about my father’s health and after landing a much better job.
As an added benefit, I was able to save money to pay off my student loans and spoil my parents a little as they grew up.
I recently treated my parents (for the second time) to their dream vacation. They loved it the first time and never imagined they could do it twice.
Because my parents still have a minor child who cannot be left alone, I choose, like last time, to use my personal vacation time to babysit.
My mother has been planning the details of her next trip and has now asked me to take more time off from work so they can take a road trip after their vacation.
Abby, I’m already devoting all my free time to their week-long vacation and I won’t be able to take a vacation myself until later in the year when I build up more time. I know she’s asking this to make the trip more fun for my dad.
Although I am a generous and patient person, this left me almost speechless, a little unappreciated and frustrated. Am I overreacting? Should I find a way to extend their trip?
— LIMITED IN OHIO
CHER LIMITED: The answer to both of your questions is No.
Your mother apparently doesn’t appreciate how generous you have been in giving this vacation to her and your father. If she wants to extend her vacation, she must make her own arrangements for your sibling to be supervised if she and your father are not available to do so themselves.
Shame on her for trying to impose this responsibility on you.
DEAR ABBY: I lost my dear wife recently. His death was a shock to everyone.
She was placed on life support for a short time while medical staff conducted tests to determine the extent of her injuries.
When it became clear that she would spend the rest of her life in a vegetative state, no decision had to be made by her family or me. My wife had advance directives in place stating that she did not want to continue living in these conditions.
I was very lucky that no one in his family wanted to challenge the document. As hard as it was for me to stop life support, I knew it was what she wanted. She died peacefully, quietly and quickly.
Abby, please encourage your readers to take the time and make the effort to write advance directives, whatever their desires.
It was the last gift my wife gave me and I will be forever grateful to her.
— REMEMBERING HER IN ARIZONA
DEAR REMEMBERING HER: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your wife.
I appreciate you taking the time to share this important information with my readers and me. Your letter serves as a reminder that all end-of-life documents should be reviewed regularly to ensure they reflect current thinking.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
California Daily Newspapers
