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Greg Gutfeld: Your priorities don’t matter to the government or the media

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Tonight’s monologue is about priorities, media priorities, government priorities — as if there’s a difference there — and your priorities, which don’t matter to them.

Here is a funny story about New York. A thug knocks out a restaurant in an unprovoked attack, leaving him in a coma with a fractured skull. I told you it was fun. The attacker was recently released from prison for rape. I know – he’s probably a victim of the system. And by system, I mean what we used to call law and order.


So where is he now? Well, after his attempted murder charge was downgraded to a misdemeanor. He’s not out on bail because trying to kill someone isn’t so different nowadays than hanging out. And now he is free to beat and rape again. So, audience, have fun getting back in your cars.

Because keeping him behind bars would have made him a victim and it’s his job to make victims. So weren’t we told that bail reform was only for non-violent crimes? But it’s a bait and switch, like when I order a very average steak and the waiter punches me in the face instead.

Once again politicians, left-wing prosecutors and judges are playing Russian roulette with law-abiding citizens. And every time they pass something like bail reform, it’s like adding another bullet to the chamber of a gun pointed at your head.

For them, the city is just an experimental aquarium. So what are some piranhas as they hide in that castle around the corner.

So that rape demon came out. It’s like the prosecutors are saying, “Hey, you got raped pretty well, but you still need to work on your murder skills. So go ahead and don’t come back until you get the hang of it.” ” You’d think Mayor Eric Adams would be all over it, but he pays more lip service than Pelosi’s plastic surgeon. Yes, here’s what he’s up to.

[Video of Eric Adams swinging sledgehammer]

So he disguised himself as a construction worker to destroy an outdoor dining shed. So first he was a cop, now he’s a construction worker. Anyone see a pattern here? I think we have a one man village.

So he took the shed down because people were peeing in it. Fair enough. But if the mayor destroyed everything that peed in New York, there would be nothing left standing, including Madonna. What do you mean? I don’t understand.

Now, unless the criminals are dressing up as sheds, I’m questioning Adam’s priorities. Like Brian Stelter’s cholesterol, it’s not his biggest problem right now. People are attacked and murdered. Nero may have played the violin, but Eric is hammering.

And what is the Governor of New York doing? She announced that she had signed an invoice replacing the word vendor with vendor. This is to help women in the workplace. Yeah. Help. She’s a real Lia Thomas. The rape has increased by 10%, and she replaces the man with the person. It really is his priority. Yeah. 911. What is your emergency? I was just mugged by a salesman. You mean seller, right? I’ll send a patrol car. But not for him, ma’am. For you!

Someone should remind the governor that while jobs don’t have gender, victims of violent crime do. Many of them are women.

So whether it’s seller or seller, New Yorkers shouldn’t buy the ******** she’s selling. It is besides the same idiot who replaced the word detained by incarcerated person. Who helps. Good. I would like to call violent criminals incarcerated people, but none of them are incarcerated anymore.

I would say the inmates run the asylum, but I can’t see the inmates anymore. I don’t want to be cancelled. And I tell people to complain to the government, but what good would that do?


But all of this is false. Signal of unnecessary virtue as cities crumble. It is a disease that afflicts this whole country, thanks to a fake media that decides what is important and what is not.

Few stories are more relevant than the loss of blood. But now it’s all about Trump. And I understand. He wrote mean tweets that kept you up at night. But last I checked, he’s not roaming the streets killing people like those MS 13 gang members he once called animals, which upset Pelosi to no end. You remember ? None of these criminals were orange.

So as businesses close and people leave cities for the same reason they left Kat’s apartment, crime and decadence, the media focuses on real brutality, like tax evasion, to to which the Trump Organization’s chief financial officer pleaded guilty. And surely the accusation had absolutely nothing to do with his association with Trump. But the 75-year-old dude, he’s going to Rikers Island, prison, while attempted murderers roam free. And why? Because our media only cares about things that have the smell of Trump on them. Including Melania’s clothes, apparently.

Literally, you don’t rate the news. The media knows that hating Trump pays the bills. Not stories that actually affect your lives. Also, on the punishment spectrum, it is the thugs who are oppressed and you who are the oppressor.


The point is, until these leftist leaders feel the real experience of real crime, they won’t care. Governor Abbott sent migrants to liberal towns so they could feel the consequences of their policies. It’s time to do it with brutality. I would love to send freed and violent felons to the quarters of the judge and prosecutors who freed him. Shit, I’ll pay for the Uber.

But of course, I can’t do that because if anything happened to the judge or the Soros-funded prosecutor, I would be complicit. And that’s my point. I’d be like judges and prosecutors, when every time one of those mutts they unleash again hurts someone else, they’re complicit too. Too bad they don’t get the credit.


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