Crying is a natural bodily response to emotions like sadness or joy, as well as stress and pain. It’s completely normal and nothing to be ashamed of, but crying isn’t easy for everyone.
Have you ever asked yourself, “Why can’t I cry?” » Here’s what you need to know about the scientific reasons why crying happens, its health benefits, and whether it’s a problem if you have trouble crying.
What is crying?
“Tears and crying serve biological function,” Dr. Michelle Andreoli, clinical spokesperson for the American Academy of Ophthalmology (AAO), told TODAY.com.
The eyes continually produce tears, which help them stay healthy and maintain vision, and are dispersed throughout the eye every time we blink. Tears contain mucus to help them stick to the eye, salt water to moisturize and protect the eye, and oil to keep them from evaporating. The eye needs a specific ratio of these three elements to be healthy.
The salt water in tears is produced by the lacrimal gland, also called the lacrimal gland. Mucus and oil come from other glands.
When we cry, the body produces a higher volume of salt water than it did initially. “If we produce enough tears, they overwhelm the tear flow, which is in the lower eyelid, and flow from the eyes to the cheeks,” says Andreoli. Tears also run down the nose, according to the National Eye Institute — hence the runny nose when we cry.
There are different types of tears, according to the AAO. Basal tears are present in the eye at all times to help lubricate and protect the surface of the eye (the cornea) from dust and debris, Andreoli explains.
Reflex tears form in response to irritants such as onions, smoke or allergens.. These help irrigate and flush out the eye, adds Andreoli.
Emotional tears are what most people refer to when they think of “crying.” These tears are a reaction or response to an emotional state, Dr. Ad Vingerhoets, a clinical psychologist and professor at Tilburg University in the Netherlands, tells TODAY.com.
Crying is often associated with sadness, but it can also be triggered by emotions like happiness, fear, surprise, anger and stress. Crying can also be a reaction to physical pain, attachment-related pain, compassion and moral feelings, according to the AAO.
“We know that there is a certain nucleus in the brain that triggers the tear glands,” says Vingerhoets. These emotional states can stimulate the same nucleus in the brain that tells the tear glands to start producing more tears, he explains.
Emotional crying includes not only shedding tears, but also the physical phenomena of sobbing or crying, he adds, which are unique to humans.
Is crying good for you?
Crying is a normal and common human behavior. It may also have some health benefits. Research suggests that crying can help clear our vision, relieve stress, improve our mood, and strengthen social bonds.
“Tears are thought to be overproduced to keep our vision clear (and protect our eyes) in times of stress or fear,” says Andreoli. There is evidence that additional stress hormones and proteins are present in emotional tears, says Andreoli.
It’s possible that the release of these hormones through crying could help regulate the body’s stress levels, but more research is needed, notes Andreoli. Crying can also help release feel-good endorphins like oxytocin, which can help relieve physical pain and promote relaxation, according to the Cleveland Clinic.
In a 2014 study on the self-soothing effects of crying, researchers found that people could experience better mood and relief after crying, but these results were inconsistent. Other studies on the mental benefits of crying are mixed. While some people report feeling better after crying, others report feeling no difference or worse after bouts of crying, Vingerhoets adds.
On an interpersonal level, crying can communicate our emotions to others. “I think the main benefit of crying is that it’s a very strong signal to others. … It triggers feelings of empathy,” he says.
Crying shows vulnerability and lets others know we need help or support, experts note. It can also help communicate that we are hurting or hurting.
People also cry together to grieve and bond. Throughout history, there have been examples of humans coming together to grieve, often in times of adversity or loss, to foster a sense of social coherence, notes Vingerhoets.
That said, crying is not the same for everyone. Whether crying is beneficial depends on several factors, says Vingerhoets. These include a person’s underlying psychological state, why they are crying, and how others react.
Not crying is not inherently unhealthy or a problem, but it can be a sign of a medical problem or mental health problem.
Why can’t I cry?
If you have trouble crying even when you want to, you’re not alone. There are several physical and psychological reasons why people fail to cry.
Medical conditions
Certain medical conditions can inhibit tear production and make it difficult to cry. The most common is keratoconjunctivitis sicca, or dry eye syndrome, which occurs when the glands don’t produce enough tears or the right type of tear film, says Andreoli.
“People have a relative lack or disproportionate secretion of salt water, oil, or mucus,” says Andreoli. When this happens, the tears may not work properly or evaporate too quickly.
Besides not being able to cry, dry eye syndrome can cause redness, burning, irritation, or blurriness, Andreoli adds. Dry eye can be caused by certain autoimmune diseases and disorders, such as thyroid disease or rheumatoid arthritis, according to the AAO.
According to the Mayo Clinic, inflamed eyelids or tear glands, allergies, and vitamin A deficiency can also cause or worsen dry eye. Dry eye affects people who wear contact lenses more often, says Andreoli, as well as people who stare at screens for long periods of time and people who live in harsh, dry, or windy climates.
Drugs
Certain medications can cause or worsen dry eye, says Andreoli. These include diuretics, beta blockers, antihistamines, decongestants, hormone replacement therapy, acne medications and birth control, according to the Mayo Clinic.
Medications for anxiety and depression, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), can also cause or worsen dry eye.
Aging
People tend to produce fewer tears as they age, so crying and crying may become more difficult for older adults. Dry eye is more common in people over 50 and women, especially if they are experiencing hormonal changes, according to the Mayo Clinic.
“Menopausal women in particular may find that their eyes are a little dry,” says Andreoli.
Mental health problems
Although some mental health conditions, like depression, can make you cry more often, they can also cause a lack of emotion or make crying more difficult.
“We know that if people are traumatized, they can lose the ability to cry,” says Vingerhoets. “The same thing happens when people are severely depressed.”
Repressed emotions
When toddlers feel overwhelming emotions, they often cry or throw tantrums to communicate their frustration or discomfort without words, TODAY.com previously reported.
As we age, we are generally better at communicating with words and controlling our emotional reactions. Sometimes people bottle up their emotions and actively avoid feeling or responding to them.
Some people are actually afraid of feeling sad or crying, notes Vingerhoets. “There are people who don’t want to go to a funeral or visit a friend who has a terminal illness or any kind of sad situation,” he explains.
Social stigma
“It may be linked to some kind of social stigma, for example when you are bullied as a child because you cry a lot,” says Vingerhoets. Research has shown that people prefer to cry when they are alone at home or in the presence of a partner or family member, for example.
“We generally don’t like to cry in the presence of strangers,” says Vingerhoets. Some people experience extreme shame or embarrassment when they cry in front of others, he adds.
Cultural and social pressures can also prevent a person from crying. “Many people think it’s important to pretend to look a certain way. … People don’t always want to show weakness, and crying is often seen as a sign of weakness,” Vingerhoets notes.
Is not crying unhealthy?
“It’s a widely held belief that crying is healthy, so if you don’t cry, are there serious consequences for your health?” said Vingerhoets.
Crying can have benefits, but there is no evidence that not crying is inherently unhealthy. In a 2018 study comparing people who lost the ability to cry to normal mourners, researchers found no major differences in well-being, says Vingerhoets, although normal cryers reported feeling more empathetic and connected to others.
If you are worried about not being able to cry or about your eye health, talk to your doctor. “If something is affecting your vision, see an ophthalmologist immediately,” says Andreoli. There are several ways to treat and prevent dry eye syndrome.
People who are unable to cry and have concerns about their mental health or expressing their emotions should talk to a mental health professional.
This article was originally published on TODAY.com
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