BMI of adult daughter is TMI


Dear Amy: My daughter is 33 and a kind and caring person.

She has a good job and a dedicated boyfriend who lives with her in a house we helped her buy.

She was normal weight until she gained about 30 pounds in college and after joining AA to quit drinking.

During the pandemic she got depressed and gained an extra 20 pounds, but in the past 18 months (since her boyfriend moved in) she’s gained at least 60 pounds.

She now weighs 100 pounds above her BMI of 25, a healthy weight.

She left her gym during Covid and did not return.

She’s been on several extreme fad diets, including vegan and keto, but has now embarked on a high-carb diet and has a BMI over 35.

Her normal-sized boyfriend also gained at least 10 pounds.

Six months ago, she saw a doctor who recommended bariatric surgery, which she declined.

She does not see doctors, despite good health insurance.

I read in your column that I can’t talk to her about it since she is fully aware of it, that she will resent me, and that only she can change it.



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