love letters
Today’s episode of the Love Letters podcast proves that travel teaches us things about ourselves and our relationships, even if it’s not always perfectly cinematic.
Chris took this cat photo in Nafplio, Greece. Christopher Muther
I traveled around the world
Once, while traveling alone, I ate something weird and ended up spending an hour in the bathroom of a commuter train outside of New York.
I share this…because traveling alone isn’t always the perfect, life-changing experience we want. Sometimes it’s unpleasant!
Movies about love and self-discovery tell us that when we travel alone (especially if we are women!), we…
- Suffer from some difficulties, like perhaps a strange insect in our sheets or in the cold bath water.
- Then we will eat tasty dishes.
- We will then realize that our recent breakup was for the best, because we need to know who we are – as a single woman!
- Then the second we’re alone, some hot person will show up to look at us like we’re a delicious steak.
- Then this person will want to have sex with us and probably marry us, and we won’t be alone anymore.
In my early twenties, I dreamed of going to Prague (a place I knew little about).
I was sitting in a smoky club (I have horrible asthma – this would be terrible for me, IRL!), and then a man came up and swept me off my feet.
He would do it, of course, without ruining my life, hindering my career, etc. He would say: “All that you want.” )
The fantasy usually ended there and I went back to watching Buffy.
Anyway…the point of all this is that today’s episode of the Love Letters podcast proves that travel teaches us things about ourselves and our relationships – even if it’s not always perfectly cinematic.
Proving that he’s our guest, World travel writer Christopher Muther. It tells a story of dating, breakups, and what traveling alone did for his confidence.
His story includes a night alone in romantic St. Barts, where Chris’ only companion was a cat. It wasn’t the worst thing for Chris, because he loves cats.
This story should make you laugh and put you in a very good mood.
Plus, there are A LOT of cats in this story, for you cats.
(Listen on Apple | Listen on Spotify)
After listening, tell us where you have traveled and found yourself – or others. Maybe we’ll have some vacation ideas.
Two answers
Sometimes people send letters to multiple advice columns. I would notice weeks later that not only had someone written to me on Love Letters, but they had also contacted someone else.
Then I ask myself: Do I want to see what another advice columnist thought about the same question?
Sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes no.
A writer of a recent letter sent me a note – and Slate’s Dear Prudence… and I wanted to look into the response. Partly because I love Prudence (aka Jenée Desmond-Harris).
The letter writer asked us if it would be a good idea to reveal your crush to a long-time friend who didn’t take the hints.
Prudence said not to do it – because clearly a relationship is out of the question.
I said do it – because I feel like the letter writer *needs* to get a response before moving on to someone else.
Deep down, I thought a refusal might make it easier to move forward.
And if the crush is mutual, so much the better! Everyone wins!
But I also completely understand Prudence’s advice. This could go either way.
Here is our column.
Here is the Dear Prudence version.
What is You think? What would you say to the letter writer?
Additionally, have you ever written in multiple advice columns to get a crowdsourced sample?
We are happy if you choose Love Letters for your questions.
Remember, You can get advice by sending your own anonymous relationship/dating/marriage/breakup/friendship question to (email protected) Or use this anonymous and practical form.
When you send your own letter, it helps someone who is stressed about the same thing.
Go green
As a reminder to Celtics fans, we have a great sports episode about the Celtics winning in 2008.
If you’re wondering what it’s like to be the wife of a basketball player whose life gets very, very intense in June, listen to Shannon Allen share her very unique story here.
Perfection
Speaking of travel, I was in Provincetown for the film festival earlier this month.
I saw Murray Bartlett, of “White Lotus” and “The Last of Us”, twice – randomly. (No, I didn’t get close. I kept my fandom to myself.)
I also saw a rainbow there, during Pride Month, in one of the most wonderful and gay places in the world, which was very visible – but very nice.
I hope you all get a chance to see something beautiful this week.
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