I took leave when my grandchild was born to help my daughter

I recently became a grandmother. As my daughter’s deadline, I decided to reduce my working hours, just in case my daughter could be convinced to let me help.

Over the weeks and my son -in -law returned to work, I intervened to help with tasks such as dishes, laundry, changing diapers and occasional quarter to help new parents try to sleep.

It ended up being one of the best decisions in my life.

I remember my own early maternity trip

While my own new maternity has taken place many years ago, there are aspects that I clearly remember: the wonder to hold a life that I have helped to create, the vacillating certainty (no) to know if we were ready to be parents and the crushing physical and mental exhaustion which has just had a newborn in our lives.

Then fear and loneliness slipped when the novelty dissipated. Everyone returned to their normal life, and I spent days with a completely helpless person that I already liked but I did not really know.

A few weeks after the arrival of my grandchild, my daughter expressed her concern that she took too long. I joked by saying that I was on “grandmother’s leave”. Every day, I became more convinced that it should, in fact, become “one thing”. Not only could I help my daughter to sail in the first days of being mom, but I was also able to spend precious time with my own child, with whom I now shared something special in common – as a parent.

I undertook to count every minute

Knowing how fast on the days turn into years, I undertook to count every minute. Some days we did shopping; Others, we sat in his living room, chatting, eating and we are emerging from our new family member. Sometimes the exhaustion took over, and she cathed while I huddled my little baby, traveling in time in days when I held my own baby in my arms.

I thought about parenting and how long we spend worrying things that don’t really matter. I reassured my daughter that errors will be made, and it’s okay. Good parents tend to be too hard with themselves.

I shared stories from my first maternity experiences; She shared the current wisdom and the things she had already learned about being a mom. We talked about how different parenting is different in the Google era and how much society can do for new mothers. At one point, she came across a universal truth: none of us really know what we are doing. A large part of the parenting invents things as you go.

We took out one day at the zoo and a local flower farm. Sometimes I fell back and looked at. I stole moments to observe the rather ordinary transition of a new generation emerging. I am amazed by the absolute competence and the quiet confidence of my daughter when she simply did what should be done. Had I been like that? Did she get these things intuitively, or have I in a way, without knowing it, transmitted some of the “secrets” of maternity?

I cherish the time I spent with them

Before we know, our leaves approached their end. As anyone on the other side of 30 knew, time tends to move much faster than we would like. While I was sad that she is going back to work soon, I cherish the time that we spent reacting as adults who are both called mom.

This time started as my attempt to facilitate things for my daughter. He ended up strengthening what was already a close link.

We had long had a relationship more like friends. I go to her to get advice as often as it comes to me. She is no longer “my little girl”, but I can always see glimpse of the child she was – the brilliance in her eyes when she smiles and the way she dances when she is happy.

My grandmother’s leave allowed me to help, giving her more time to focus on the joys of new maternity. This also gave me a seat in the front row to attend his joy.

Overall, I would give it five stars – highly recommended.