Ah, Paris. Otherwise known as the “city of love”. I was incredibly lucky (and what some would even say quite courageous) to travel solo in the United States and abroad, like when I went on horseback in Zion National Park by myself or that I had a quick getaway in London and I met a lover during my trip. But I have never ventured in Paris alone – so far.
Maybe the whim of going alone has never come because Paris is such a romantic city. Whenever I previously visited, something on architecture, the apparently endless wine supply and incredibly beautiful people made me feel happy to have made my partner travel by my side.
Ironically, it therefore seems appropriate that this choice to make a solo trip would come after something completely less sexy: a devouring break. It was a deep hollow, a loss of the way I saw things and myself. So, in what looked like a secret operation to find Hayley, after months to keep what was in the past and what could now never be, I got on a flight and I went to Paris for five days.
I went to Paris with a complete solo route
Seven hours later, I arrived well rested, relaxed and ready. Even if I am a frequent solo traveler, I was certainly a little nervous to take Paris alone, so I first stopped at the hotel to take a break. After being located in my room in front of the breathtaking garden of the tuileries, I walked in a nearby borough, where I treated myself with chocolate pain and an oats in an adorable coffee. There, I wrote a letter full of questions to which I sucked in answers. Can I love myself through it? Will I feel full desire and be desired again? Is this trip the answer? I couldn’t answer it then.
On the second day, I woke up brilliant and early to admire the views. I had reserved a boat cruise on the Seine, where I spent an hour and a half on board, drinking champagne and eating dark chocolate and strawberries. See the Eiffel Tower literally surpass above me and the other water passengers was so fun, and even a little fanciful.
Surprisingly, I was happy to be there by myself on an experience that couples generally do together. I even made new friends with other solo boats lovers, and we shared the Martinis of Expresso later.
The author explored the city of love during his solo trip. With the kind permission of Hayley Folk
I rediscovered myself during my trip, despite my sadness
Of all the things that I reserved to do during this trip, the most exciting was a mastery of pleasure with Sexpert Marie Morice. After having experienced a break that looked like something in French, I wanted to explore my desires, which made me vibrate and how I could overcome this.
Although I am a writer of sex and business relationships, I learned a lot in the course of two hours. It was a refreshment on my anatomy, the history of the pleasure of women and the control of it, and how, when we look at ourselves, we can find our own path of desire. It was nice to be surrounded by other women, each with your own stories, and to sit with what I want in my body.
I also attended a macaroon manufacturing course, which was one of the most funny experiences I had during the trip. The creation of lemon and pistachio macaroons with strangers brought me out of my head and in my hands and my heart. The sugar touched my lips and everything around me was sort of soft.
The author went to Paris during a solo trip. With the kind permission of Hayley Folk
Throughout the trip, I started to train again despite my sadness. I walked through the steep streets of Montmartre, I bought steak fries, I met new friends, I went to a sexy shop and, instead of having an appointment with a man on which I slipped, I found my own lust in the holiness of white sheets in a hotel bed with open windows.
I have also been present for the first time in months. With each activity that I did and every feeling I had, I remembered that not everyone has the privilege of traveling alone. How wonderful that I can?
On the last day of my trip, I went up to the top of the Seine before settling on a bench. I opened my newspaper and I looked at the questions I had written a few days before. Can I love myself through it? Will I feel full desire and be desired again? Which then looked like an anomaly, a deeply rooted dilemma in which I never find the answers, suddenly easier than ever.
The answer is, and has always been, yes. My self-esteem has always been there. I felt more connected to myself than ever before. Sometimes I assume that you just need a small perspective (and solo trips) to see it.
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