‘The Hand That Rocks the Cradle’ Review: Hulu’s Parental Terror Remake

Rewatch the juicy parental nightmare thriller The hand that moves the cradle three decades after its release, it’s a reminder of what a fine and versatile craftsman Curtis Hanson was. Over the next 10 years of his film career, he directed the white-knuckle adventure thriller The wild river; the hard black LA Confidentialwhich won him an Oscar as co-writer; the bittersweet comedy-drama Wonderful boys; and the quasi-memory hip-hop saga of Eminem 8 miles – which still hold up.

It’s no big surprise that Hulu’s new release The hand that moves the cradledirected by Michelle Garza Cervera from a screenplay by Micah Bloomberg, can be classified in the “useless remakes” category. By these standards, it’s far from the worst. Who remembers the years 2008 Women1993 Born yesterday or years 2002 Sweptto name just three mutilated classics? But atrocities are a low bar to clear.

This modern take on a script born from Amanda Silver’s film school thesis doubles down on the traumatic story and victim blaming and stirs up some undercooked female homoerotic tension. But it dilutes the sinister pleasures of the original and destabilizes the central dynamic by placing the mother who has everything and the nanny determined to destroy her life in a contest of mental instability. Maybe two injured women for the price of one seemed like a good idea on paper?

It also makes for a disappointing compromise in the best friend discovering the truth department. For many of us, luxury real estate broker Marlene Craven ranks among Julianne Moore’s most delightful performances. In these joyless times when constructive criticism can land you in HR, hearing Marlene lash out at her Harvard-educated assistant is like good sex.

Real estate attorney Caitlin Morales (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) is expecting her second child when she meets Polly Murphy (Maika Monroe) while working pro bono on tenant rights for low-income people in need of housing assistance. Shortly after the baby’s birth, they meet again at a farmers’ market, where Caitlin is alarmed to learn that Polly is still struggling. But she offers her babysitter services.

Although Monroe plays Polly, quietly and intense, with the hollow stare of an Olsen twin and the warmth and social skills of Travis Bickle, Caitlin hires him after a quick check on his childcare experience. Her architect husband Miguel (Raúl Castillo) agrees that Caitlin is at the end of her rope and could use help. He fears that her difficulties are a repeat of the postpartum depression that followed the birth of their first child, Emma (Mileiah Vega), who is now 10 and prone to tantrums, usually directed at her overbearing mother.

While doing little to hide her creepy vibe, Polly engages in small acts of sabotage – she plays with Caitlin’s medications, putting her on further nerves; steals the cioppino at a dinner party, giving everyone a stomach ache; and ignores Caitlin’s sugar-free veto for Emma and her little sister Josie. Instead, she makes a secret pact with Emma over cupcakes and denies the baby her mother’s unsweetened breast milk.

However, Polly makes herself indispensable, so when she starts talking about leaving unaffordable Los Angeles, Caitlin and Miguel take her to the guest quarters meant for her aging Mexican parents. (In a tongue-in-cheek dig that’s the closest the film comes to a subversive vein, Caitlin reveals: “Her mother is not a fan of the United States.”)

The airy house is a beautiful contemporary construction of wood and floor-to-ceiling glass (we know someone will pass through at least one pane of glass). But what kind of family-in-peril thriller fails to take advantage of a pool that just begs for chaos?

Polly tells Caitlin early on that she dates women, prompting her employer to declare that she was also gay before meeting Miguel. But whatever sexual thrill this was supposed to implant is too underdeveloped to add much, even after Polly catches Caitlin looking out her window while she engages in erotic asphyxiation sex with her punky friend Amelia (Yvette Lu).

Meanwhile, the nanny’s behavior becomes more concerning to Caitlin, especially after she brings home fireworks for Emma to play with. But only Stuart (Martin Starr), Caitlin’s friend and colleague, takes her fears seriously enough to investigate, which is a bad decision. Uh.

Miguel is more convinced that his wife is experiencing another postpartum episode, even overreacting to Emma’s abrupt declaration at the dinner table that she wants a wife, not a husband, when she grows up. Castillo, as always, is an engaging presence, but there’s only so much he can do with a role in which he shows all the signs of a loving, sensitive partner and yet refuses to listen until it’s almost too late.

Polly’s past is suggested through fragments of the childhood difficulties she shares with Emma and a horror-style prologue showing a young girl standing in front of a burning house. But unlike Hanson’s film, where it was clear from the start what motivated the vengeful widow named “Peyton” (played with vicious thrill by Rebecca De Mornay), Bloomberg’s screenplay untangles the root of Polly’s simmering resentment for far too long.

By the time questions are answered, not only about Polly but also about how her story intersects with Caitlin’s, the glacial pace and lack of suspense have dulled the thriller’s hook. Mexican filmmaker Garza Cervera’s directorial debut was the well-received 2022 motherhood body horror film. Huesera. But his second feature, while quite clever, has the vapid feel of a Lifetime film.

Attempts to amp up the dread with a whispered synth score and dark vocal tracks from Low and Nick Cave don’t achieve much in the way of atmosphere, and the jolts of ugly violence feel inorganic to the overall tone.

The actors are fine, although Monroe has been more effective when threatened (in films like It follows And Long legs) rather than distributing it. Winstead (who seems very Rosamund Pike) does what is expected of her, to the point of making Caitlin abrasive and disturbed. But this is a remake with little compelling reason to exist.

What a sad testament to the state of the industry that, while the original film dominated the U.S. box office for four straight weeks and went on to turn a tidy profit with worldwide receipts of $140 million against a budget of less than $12 million, the remake will fall on Hulu and, like all but a handful of prestige streaming originals, will be quickly forgotten.